How do I spend my new year eves?

It was around 11 o'clock when I got this pain feeling in my stomach. I decided to go to the staffs room and take some rest. I laid there for a few minutes but the pain still hit. I feel like a hand in my stomach, grabbing and squeezing my inner part. It hurts so damn much. I took the wine red table cloth and quickly turn it into a blanket. I closed my eyes.


I feel like I'm going to cry. I never had a history of gastric or appendix as I recall. Only a normal stomach ache before. Nothing serious. I wandered at the safety first box and found some tablets. Panadol. Swallowed it. I closed my eyes again. Trying to ease the pain by having some sleep. Let my mind rest. But the pain wasn't going anywhere.

I decided to call it a night. I rang my brother and asked him to sent me home.

The fifteen minutes ride was a hellish one. I got this tingle feeling in my throat and asked my brother to pull of quite a number until we were in front of the Sri Sabah flat. I thrown up. Next to this black Honda Accord. All my night meal was there. Chicken. Rice. Veges. Haha. Yucks!! Disgusting.

I spent the night rolling, screaming and praying for this pain to ease. With no sleep at all.

The next morning I went to Hospital University Kebangsaan Malaysia. Just to do a simple check up. You know got some painkiller and etc. But the other thing happen. I was detained . I was required to do blood test, urine test and got this two pines of sodium chloride pushed inside me. I was suspecting for having an appendicitis.

The only good thing is they gave me the painkiller which subsided the pain I've suffered.

But they have to wait for my blood test and another report from specialist first. Around one o'clock the specialist arrived. And a good news arrived too. I wasn't having any appendicitis. It just a normal stomach ache. Even the symptoms was different. Maybe the first doctor was playing some kind of prank one me. Damn you doc.

Except for her touch on my belly which feel so nice. Haha.

They decided to give me some more painkiller and this tablets to kill my dizziness. And they told me to get some rest. Which I think sleep will be a proper word. I got back home and do as the doctor said. Sleep til around eight o'clock to wake up with this dizziness feeling not sure from the effect of the previous medications or from this long sleep.

So if you guys asks "How do I spend my new year eves?".

I will says lying on my bed with my lappy, a bottle of mineral water and a white pack of this so bitter tablets. Urghh. But I still watch the 'pertunjukan bunga api'. From my window of course. Duh. I'm thinking of throwing up again. Need to rush to the toilet. See you guys later.

Happy new year everyone. God bless us all.


School girl farewell : It takes the one to have the other. And a proclaimation.

One of my colleague has parted from my department last night. She's quitting since the school holidays were going to end. She just fifteen by the way. Just got her Penilaian Menengah Rendah result few weeks back.

Being the youngest and the only 'she' in my department, she fitted herself very well. And the best thing she did on her last day was crying. She just keep crying for the whole night. Sobbing and sobbing.

Our laughs and teases did nothing to stop her.

That's her. A girl who me and my fellows know for only a month or so. Long enough to create this emotional abuse on the name of friendship.

Owh please. I'm not crying. There's a dust fall straight into my right eyes.

My last entry was quite a big hit. Thanks to Kawie. I just wanna tell you guys something. One of my biggest secret should I say.

You know the 'S' mark you saw on my forehead. It actually wasn't refer to single, it refer to survival.

Haha. Pretender.


Told you I got a lot of ideas here, in my mind.

I met my old classmate last Thursday. He was accompanying his girlfriend all the way from Pahang to Shah Alam, to appeal for her un-success Degree application. They were around town so I invited them for a dinner at the nearby mamak stall.

We were into some talks when he suddenly asked me this;

"Kau single lagi ke? Gile kebal. Haha"

And I was like uh, shut up man. Duh. I hate to answer this question. Fed up already. What's wrong with being single?

The only reason why I still being single till now is because of this;

"True love is hard to find."

I believe in this. I honestly think the harder I try to win a girl's heart the greater satisfaction I'll earn. And hopefully the eternity it is.

Falling in love was easy. Learning what love is need a whole lot of experiences and understanding. I always fall in love. I can easily fall in love with the girl I met at the BB plaza. Or at the traffic light. Or even at the petrol station.

But to utter the three word, I just don't have that guts.

Maybe she likes me too. Maybe she accepts my words. For how long then? Three months? Six? A year? Before we realized that we weren't meant to be together and we should give each other a break. Separated.

Think again, maybe I'm just trying too hard,

and I do believe in 'love at a first sight'.

Oh God, how I wish You can just drop me one of Your angel and make her fall in love with me.

Yours truly,
Love Doc.



I do prefer a virgin even if I'm not.

Have you prepare your new year wish list? All the thing you want to-have and to-do in 2010. You are so lucky because I'm sharing mine today.

Let's start with what I want to have?

First of all, I'm thinking of finding myself a black leather jacket and black slim-fit trouser. Also equipping myself with one or two rockett t-shirt. Or badger at least. And I found this shiroi neko things. Impressive as well.

I browsed thorough my drawer. Owh this shirt. This one is three years old already. And this pants too. It's outdated. No body's wear a wash-out-and-tear jeans anymore. I should get a new one. The one on displays at dior boutique really catches my eyes.

And my wallet. My shoes. My handphones. Or maybe I should get a new friends too?


We human, always love the new things.


Another monday blues. It's my off day and I'm totally out of words. Got a few ideas reels in mind but too tired to compose it. So I just make this entry. A quick one. Beside new year is just around the corner.

The whole weekend was like hell. Busy. Tired. It hurts me, for not able to do the daily blogwalking and reply your comments. Really sorry.

But after all it's just me being me.




This is the continuation from the last entry.

My other friend is Adam.

He come from a poor family. His father works as a Pekerja Am Rendah and his mother is a fulltime housewife. He spend his teenagers life in a boarding school since he was included into the PPRT school's program.

Being the eldest of five, Adam sometimes had to use his scholarship money to finance his brother and sister studies when his parent can't.

He remember searching for a coins behind his locker just to get himself a pack of Maggi. He also remember tighting his belt to avoid lunch.

Adam parent never intervent in anything related to his life. And realizing the difficulties that his family faced day by day, Adam decided to work after his SPM. He then found a works as a mechanic at a workshop.

Five years working there, Adam then promoted to more higher position.

It didn't take long before Adam decided to start another workshop. His own workshop. And his workshop now is the main sponsor of 1Malaysia F1 car.

Don't compare the already seen Bob-easy-life and Adam-hard-life. Compare the missing experiences that both guys loose. The one which they'll be very proud to tell their grandchild about it in the future.


Three months stranded in a land of no man and he still screaming "Anybody's here?"

I have two old friends.

One of them is.. Let's just called him Bob. Bob come from a rich family. His father was one of the most successful engineer in the state while his mother works as a lawyer.

Bob is the only child in his family and by being the only, Bob can just has everything at a single point. He even got his first car; Honda Civic as his birthday present when he just eighteen years old.

To make sure that Bob will succeed in his life, his parent has planned all Bob life.

They sent Bob to international school before make him continued his study at one of the high rated college in the Kuala Lumpur. Everything was working well for Bob. He graduated with flying colours and then became his father successor. Taking over his father business.

I'll tell you bout my other friends in the next entry.

By the way, It's Christmas season. And it's about presents. Lol.

So who want to give me this pair of Macbeth Jack's Mannequin Studio Project shoes? Would you Mr Santa? Would you?



Your words like a hundred tone lorry placed on my shoulder. Damn it's heavy.

Around 4 am, the van arrived in front of my house. The arrival was loud enough to wake all my neighbors from their weekend dreams. There stood at the front door waiting was all my siblings and some of my relatives. All sad for a reason I'm not sure what it is.

My elder brother quickly put on his sandals and headed toward the van. My younger brother followed him with an umbrella in his hand to protect him from the earth downpour. After a little talks with the driver, my elder brother then called the others out to the ambulance.

My relatives and friends whom hang around at my living room came closer. Lend their hand to lift something from the van. I just watched the scene from my bedroom window. Not really know what to do. Not sure what was happen actually.

The truth is, I honestly didn't feeling well for the last couple of days. That's why I prefer to be in my room. Read some books, ate my medications and off course have some rest. It was doctor suggestion after all. "Have some rest". And he kept telling me to do the same thing every time we met.

Hey, there he is. Doctor Ghani with his.. Wait. I remember her. She was my former music teacher at my secondary school, Miss Aida. I remember how she guide us to become the winner of the 2004 school marching band competition. She must be in her fourty now but she still beautiful.

I'm so glad to see her again. And she must be glad too. I need to meet to her. We haven't meet for how long? 10 years? Besides I haven't yet apologize about the lost instrument cases during my senior time. I was involved with the cases but nobody found it till now.

I grabbed my handset and push my door wide open, headed straight to the front door. I wandered around the living room trying to find her when I noticed a cry and doa reciting. I look back to see my siblings and this group of people surrounded something on the floor. I moved a bit closer, curiously.

And the view shocked me.

There lied on the floor, in that white dress was no one but me. Pale but still with a smile on his face.

For those who read this blog from the first entry, I'm sure you realized how my way of writing changed. Some says that it was me being mature. But I think it's just me practicing hypocrisy.

So again. Fuck!!


On the verve of losing, I closed my eyes and think of another match.

Fighting and arguing is a norm. No matter how small the problem is, we'll end up blaming and pointing fingers to each other. Some guys do accept their lost. But some don't. They rather die than accepting the fact that they weren't on the winning side.

Some would just prefer to play it safe. Turn around and walk away. Pretend that they saw and heard nothing. But deep down, their angst heated to the highest level. High enough to burn a group of Viet-Kong army. Ok. That's so hypocrite. Next.

From this small argument, a small tension created. Then it become bigger. And then booom!!


Errm. War for me was nothing than watching a TV series. We watch the drama. Heard the stories. We cried. We sympathies with the hero break-up. We cheered when the hero beat the bad guys. But then come commercial breaks and what did we do?

We changed the channel.

I'm not a soldier. I never experience war. And I'm not an anti-war-reformist too.

But I'm old enough to feel what losing taste like. And I don't mind to taste another.

I thought I draw an ACE but it turns out to be a JOKER.

What a fuck? Lol.


Lesson learned : HARD.

Today we'll use a HARD word as an example.

We started with this girls who always have a hard time in her life. It's hard for her to find her true love. It's hard for her to find a nice Shiseido mascara during the Year End Sales. Or to find suitable blouse to wear with her new LV handbag.

How about this guy? He too have a hard life. He have to struggle to get into university. He struggled to prove to his family that he can live his own life. He can succeed just like his sisters and brother. And make his family proud.

And this family too. They on their to watch some movies. They says it's hard to get the movie ticket during weekend. So they just bought a gold class ticket. It was once a year family gathering by the way. Beside it's hard to gather all the family members when most of them live overseas.

What's hard for me?

A single mother selling nasi lemak in the morning and cleaning toilet at night to raise her six beloved children. That is hard.

We see thing different from others.

Owh, I met Jay Chou during the launching of his new movie, Treasure Hunter at GSC Pavilion. He's gorgeous. I'm not a big fan of him but do watch some of his movies, ie: Secret. And that actress with him just now. She's a damn hottie.

I'm gonna take some sleep. I reply all your comments and do the blogrunning later.


I'm so not good at breaking heart. Do forgive me.

Well yesterday was a hell of a day. I was so damn tired. Back home around five. I was thinking of doing an entry about love, instead I finished my morning dreaming in front of my lap top. So I failed to make any entry yesterday. Which mean failed to make you guys think again. Lol.

The whole week was quite messy actually. I missed this gathering handle by this nice friends of mine. And failed to get this chick a movie ticket. Duh. Did I feel guilty? Yes I am. I just rang the "sorry song" again and again. Gave them my very best reasons and excuses.

Oh. I know they gonna forgive me. Let just forget about it.

But this one un-ignored feeling really bothered me.

We always think that this person used the sorry word as an escapade for all the mess they've made. Okay. Not we. Just me. I always, always do that. Why?

That's because I rarely experience that other side. The guilt side off course. I do be on that side for sometime. But it just not enough to teach me how haunted it is to utter this cheap word.

Do you think a guy who dumped a girl (whom he shared a plenty of sweet, great, happy time together) can just continue his life happily ever after, with saying sorry? Vice-versa. Or do you think a father who failed to provide enough foods for his family can sleep well at night after saying sorry to his wife?

They never do if they really mean it.


I should try this myself. The dump part. Haha.


I survived this war because I ran. Not because I fight. You can call me coward but you can't change the fact that I still alived.

Sometimes you need to let that timid mind of yours do all the talking.


Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. And I am a..

Wise man off course.

I found some of my blog-friends expressed their concern about the limitation of idea in producing a good entry to be post on their blog. From what I've learned during my one month and a half old blogging experience, you don't have to make thing hard for yourself just to post a nice entry.

Ideas come from everything. From the big screen at Golden Screen Cinema to the smallest blogger comment you view on your Iphone. I basically write most of my story from what I see around me and some just come from my wild imagination.

You don't have to be a parent to talk about child. You don't have to be a lawyer to talk about act and section. And you don't have to be an angel to talk about heaven. You just have to be yourself.

Just sharing okay. Erk. Not really. The honest reason is because I too are out of idea. I was thinking to put that Wise man off course only as my entry when this idea hit me. Haha. And now I finish posting an entry just by talking crap. That's pretty impressive.


By the way, I quote the title from this girl entry.



I'm too honest to cheat death.

"Kita hanya merancang, Tuhan yang menentukan"

Okay. To be honest this proverb really grown in me. It makes me think twice before planning on something. It makes me considered the need of planning when I already know everything has been written and decided.

No I'm not against this. I believe in Qada and Qadar. I know that all our fate has been written and decided before our first breath. And it isn't harsh to say that we were just like that actor and actress on that big screen, scripting and playing the role given.

Why the hell we need planning for? Why can't we just let it happen?

It's because that's damn bored. That will only make you tired of yourself. That will kill the phrase live your life. And that's surely make a people like me either end up in mental hospital or include in the suicidal case. Which one do I prefer? None of both.

So what should we do?

Simple. Try to fight the fate. It's fate that you have brain tumor. It's rumors when the doctor says you only have six month to live. And it's fate when you died just three days later. But why don't you try and make it seven? Eight or even a single year? Six month and a day was an absolute accomplishment.

Then again. It's easier said than done.

Enough with fate. Next stop; Humanity. Just ask this Mr Jake Sully. He should know better.


I wish I really am mr suitable for everyone. Duh.

I was doing a blog-running as usual when I bump into this recent domestic scandal. No. It's not Mr Woods. He's international. This is a domestic one. Local. Plus why would I care if Mr Woods is having an affair? He's not my favorite sportsman after all. Still I have to admit that this guy is really good in swinging stick and finding hole. Lol.

Ok. Back to the main topic. The domestic scandal. I just heard that blogger attitudes were a little out of control lately so the government will make an amendment on the previous Communication and Multimedia Act 1998. It's basically because the rumors that the BW1 (Blog War One) will be happen any time soon.

I sigh and pull my red and black stripe blanket higher and fuhh.. go to sleep. Haha.

What? What do you expect from me? Go out there and be a hero? Urgh. Give me a break. I just got home from a ten hours job dude. I'm damn tired.

Bye the way, if the war really is happen, can you save those with an "A" on their chest for me?


What have I learned from anonymous's myth?

"I learn how to fly high by watching you fall deeper down. I may laugh but I never enjoy it. Not even once."

As a normal human being I don't only learn from my mistakes. I learn from everybody's mistakes. Especially those with self pro-claimed friends. And it's more interesting when they too learned from my mistakes.

I neither didn't have enough money to buy them a house in Beverly Hills nor clever enough to help them succeed in their study and career. I just have all this from-happy-to-bad experiences to jot down. Maybe that's the least I can do.


Just for your much needed information I make a research on what it really mean by anonymous and why they picked that word instead of silent-reader or whiners or dickhead. I think they didn't created this word for nothing. Lets see.

I just turn the word anonymous upside down and inside out when it turn out to be this;

annoy + muso or annoy + omus.

So I just concluded it as a house/phrase of irritation? But not all of them irritated.

Owh I'm so good at literature now. I should start writing a book and get the royalty to furnish my old days. Lol.

Damn I'm hot. Fufu~ (sing a love song)


Signs were shown. Lots. I just can't see it..

When was the last time you said to yourself that you want to change? From bad to good, off course.

For example you just cheat in your final exam when guilt feeling wash thorough you and you start to think to never ever do that thing again. You think you should be honest to yourself. But then?

Or you've done a bad thing and you really regret it. You promised yourself that you will never repeating that same mistake. And three days later you were back into this conflict yet again.


Last entry was a hell of metaphoric. But it's never a real one. It was something that played in my mind. And I just write it. What exactly I'm trying to say is "Gua pun cakap tak serupa bikin". Darn simple.

By the way thanks to Lumut for that lovely prizes. Really appreciates it. We met during the PLORE event held at Pasar Seni yesterday. Lots of bloggers came. Me as usual play hide and seek. Want to publish it here but my Nokia 3310 camera wasn't working.

Oh. I remember Lumut says "Kau lain la dari apa yang aku expect". Didn't really know what's that suppose to mean actually. Lol.

My english blogging teacher started to mark my entry recently. So I have to write with a dictionary and an english grammar book in my hand after this. Wattafuck?

Get a life dude.


I point my next-to-the-middle finger at you. But the rest pointing me back. A metaphoric entry.

A ringing phone bring me back to life. That's when I noticed there was someone stand right in front of me. But it was a bit blur. The dim light portrayed only a few part of his face and body.

"Who are you? How can you be here in my room?"

There was a weird look on his face. I draw myself closer and reach for his hand. He too. Our fingers touch. He was so cold. I can feel it. A number of questions rushed through my mind.

"Are you sick? What's the problem with you?"

To my surprise he just repeating what I says. Annoyingly. And it's really pissed me off.

"What the fuck with you dude? Why in hell you keep repeating my words?"

He stood there still silence.

"Dude I'm talking to you. Answer me. Or are you deaf or something?"


"Fuck you."

I totally lost it. My palm has already transformed into Mohammad Ali boxing glove. I look at him closely. Close enough that I can see the shape of him. And that's when i realized.

"A mirror? I was talking to myself all this while?"


I considered this a good verbal twatting.

I've a chat with one of my Chinese colleague who think that prostitution were just like other commerce transaction. We pay for their services. They provide it. If there's no demand then there's no supply.

I just nodded my head half agreed.

But then he made me totally agreed when he says that all of us are just human. We do make mistake. Some might recover from it but some might just lost in it. But one thing for sure is that we're still human.

No matter how bad they are. How dirty she is. Or how prudence we are.

Human should treat each other as human.

Sometimes I don't need a three pages entry to tell you guys how i feel. A word or two will be just fine. Much like pictures, words also tell thousand stories. Lets see.




I rather spend the weekend with a bunch of asshole than attending Grammy with a troops of hypocrite.

Me and my brother were on our way back from work when we saw this group of guys singing and playing guitar next to the cybercafe somewhere along Chow Kit road. Being a lad who enjoy music so much we didn't mind to have a look on their activities. We park the car in front of the already closed workshop and headed toward them.

There were seven of them. I can tell by the look that two of them were Indonesian. The rest were undoubtedly Malaysian. Without any hesitation we just say hi, a little handshake and grab the empty place next to them. And to my surprise the were all friendly. Talkative I should say.

The guy on the guitar were playing some old songs. Santana all time favorite, Black Magic Woman were next. Duh, this guy was unbelievable. He play it beautifully. Thing were getting hotter when he hit the Somewhere Over The Rainbow keys. Gosh how I love this song.

Little did I know that the cybercafe was actually just a camouflage for the gambling activities that been run inside. The guy in the snow caps told me since he was one of the person in charge there. He offered me a place too. Lol. But I really don't give a damn about it. I'm just so happy to watch this guitar guy rocks on.

Time passed by a pretty quickie. It almost six a.m and these guys just know when to stop. After a little talk and chat we continue our short journey home. Safely.

What a way to end a lousy night.


Just slit my throat. It'll hurt me more. Breaking my heart was nothing.

She just stand in front of me. Head held up. I look into her naked eyes. Remember the last time we've been in this situation was just two weeks ago. And it was a real mess up.

I keep staring. Waiting for the answer from that sweet lips of her.

Still no answer.

So I take a deep breath and walk away. Leave her with my own misery. Wishing that she'll stop me before I disappear into the dark night. So I can give her another chance. Another apology.

Only if she deserve it?


Okay. That was completely self monologue. Don't mind it.

The fact is that all guys were born with their own ego. It's in their vein. It's either you girls live with it or learn how to tame it. And both considered a sacrifices. Big time.

Damn it. Why should I sound like a love doctor at six o'clock in the morning? Weirdo. I click on the taskbar. My winamp was playing Mr Curiosity by Jason Mraz.

Erm. No wonder.


Why I didn't blog yesterday? Live entry from the graveyard.

It was Saturday. Me along with two of my best buddies were having an unimportant discussion at the nearby mamak stall. We were about to discuss on the global warming issues when this guy come approach us.

"Hello bos, boleh beri saya dua minit tak?" he said then take the empty sit next to me.
"Emm.. Takpe lah bro, kitorang tak minat la all this thing." Rayme try to escape.
"Just two minute bos. Boleh ar?"
"Errm." I think of another excuses.
"Two minute saja."
"Ok la. Two minutes." Rayme unwillingly let him.

Without giving a damn care about the uneasy look on our face, this guy start babbling about his product. Showing us all the files, catalogs and articles taken from the news praising and telling how good their products are. The two minutes passes but this guy still didn't stop, still persuade us to have a hand on the product he offered.

After a long five minutes, he stopped.

"So macam mana bos? Interest tak?"
"Takpe lah bro. Thanks."
"Haiya. Penat saya cakap-cakap. Luorang tak mau pulak. Lain kali cakap awal-awal la kalau tak mau la." he then started to mumbling.

Duh, this guy is so annoying. He was the one asking for our time and now he was blaming us for wasting his time. And just to make thing even worse he uttered some harsh words. To us yes. I then lost my inhibitions. I take the fork in front of me, gave the man a glance look and then..


"The fuck is going on with you man?" I asked him. The bloods dripped from the end of the fork stuck at his chest. His white polka dot shirt started to turn red. All the guys around was like screaming shock with my action. Some of them backed away. Unfortunately for me there was a group of policeman in the stall and they hurried to my table. One of them pointed his gun to me and BAMM!!. He shot me right in my fucking head.

Ok. The last part was a total lie. Lol. This is what happen actually.

I take the fork in front of me, gave the guy a quick glance and then started to eat my Maggie goreng mamak. My two buddies just shook their head. Not wanting to waste any more time with this really stupid guy. The guy packed his things and move to the next table.

Thanks man. You just ruined my weekend mood.


First = (one) + (th)

My mom once told me that I nearly break my arm when trying to do my first walk. I fall straight onto the floor from a couch. Thank god I'm alive.

I first drink Horlick when I was in secondary school. I puked for no reasonable reason. I stop drink it till now. Copy and paste?

My first work, as a kitchen helper at the school's dining hall wasn't a nice experience too. I got into a fight with a group of the student there and one of my colleague got fired because he punched that stupid asshole.

My first love was with my... Erk. No comment. Next topic please.

I remember my first time creating blog. I write. Nobody view. Nobody read. And I don't think nobody care.

Not all our first were a good one. That's why we were given second, third, fourth and so on.

But it's sure unforgettable. That's why the first cut is always the deepest.

Cope with it.



No new entry for today. Please wait. Or click here.


Judge vs Impression. Simplify.

We do judge people around us. I for example personally think that the guys with so metro sexual look was nothing but gays and the girls with show-more-skin-than-cloth-style puffing cigar was a bitch. Negativism.

Remember this 'don't judge the book by it's cover'. Can we still use that?

Nowadays first impression always come on top. Try go to your interview with fuck-face look. I'm sure you'll be doomed before you heard your name being called. Unless you applied for the cast-away role. Shit.

I always simplify 'Get out of here and leave me alone' by saying Fuck Off.

Harsh. Innit?


Wise guys loosed?

Wise guys disagreed on almost everything. I mean every single thing. That's why they have less friends. Just ask me. Duh.

Sometimes I just don't prefer being

I don't do poppysmic too.

Complicated huh?


Girls can't just understand it.

I've been doing some blog-running when I found the comments about guys who will ignore their girls when they're watching football match. I can't remember which blog it come from and under what topic it is.

Hate to say it but hell yes we will.

Sorry girl but guys are so much into football. It's our passion. Football make a guy a man. No matter if they're die-hard one or win-side one. We're just bind to this game.

Yes you will find some of us who never ever prefer football. Nope. No comment bout that.

So please girls stop sharing your shopping experience while we watching football. Otherwise you don't mind telling it for the second time. Later. After the match off course.

We just need that 90 minutes.

Do you know David Beckham? He was the first man landed on the moon. Duh.


Choosy : No wonder.

Ok. This is a true life time confession.

I don't eat kuey teow so I don't enjoy wandered around looking for the best char kuey teow in town. I won't mind follow but make sure the restaurant offer other foods on it's menu lists.

This is bad news for my family too especially my mom. She has to cook two different meals when kuey teow is one of it. Thanks mom.

I also don't eat petai. If my mom included petai in her sambal udang, I'll then try my very best to separate it. Tempoyak was another meal on my no-no-list. Same goes with budu, cencaluk and tempe.

But I loves durians so much. I love woke up early in the morning searching for the fallen durians.

I first drink horlick when I was in secondary school. I puked for no reasonable reason. I stop drink it till now. Can't even stand the smell of it. Still.

I tell all this story to a girl before. And she was like "Whoa. You should be grateful for all the thing you've got."

Actually it's not about being ungrateful. It's about truth. It's how I speak for myself.

Or maybe I'm a choosy freak. Too choosy I think.

I select everything that relates to my life. From foods to clothes to even friends. Girlfriend too. No wonder I still have the 'S' status tattooed to my fucking forehead. Damn.

By the way, I rather choose live in this fake 'dreams' than saying 'goodbye'.