You just don't know what I made of : None.

I got one unfinished post stored in my draft. Entitled 'You just don't know what I made of.' and created about a month ago. I spend an hour thinking what was it actually about. Unfortunately, nothing comes out.

You know, in life, there's a time when you felt like the whole universe were against you. When everything you do seem like a crime to others. A single scratch on the door could create such noise that every eyes will stare you to death. Fuck.

I never condemned others who've made mistake during their previous day. Because I was too afraid of being one. Someday.

Yeah. I might not a-selfish-backstabber-type-of-friend today, but in three years time, when my boss decided that it is more appropriated to kick my closest friend out of the team so that the team can perform even better; engineered a better future for my family, I can't promised you I won't. Sorry.

Or I might now enjoying my time of being the sweet and cute nerdy guy in class, waiting for some random girl called and informing me that I have just knocked her up.

Dope. Who knows.

Forget about preparing those umbrella shit. What you need then is you and yourself. Because after all, it's your own fucking world.


Running for the presidential post.

Err.. err.. Hi. It's been a while, nope?

As I recalled, this blog never featured any picture from the day it start except for the banner, the butterfly-guy profile picture and the followers. It was on purpose actually.

The banner, which if you noticed changed quite a time with the exception of those five magic words. The profile picture is staying, making sure that you always bear in mind of the guy behind this hot-damn blog.

And last but not least, the follower picture which I think have nothing to do with you but everything to do with me.

Thanks, to you.


Sabbatical 1.0 : Mediocre.

Like a warrior who didn't adore his strength that much, there was a point when I felt white flag is the best option available. Like the old time when I failed to put myself into any university. When all my friends text-ing me, telling me how wonderful life in college are.

Like today, when I have no fucking note to spend and only some words left to pray.

Go sabbatical as AJ Nismihan says.


Writer's Etiquettes : Right word blasphemy.

I don't hate people.

No. The truth is, when you can't find yourself the right word, lies happened. So the way you dig yourself down. You should/must know that you're not gonna last long.

Still. I don't hate people.


Because beer leads to more beer.

If I was on a backpacking, looking for a motel to spend my night in, I will never go for the twin-bed room. No matter how cheap or how comfortable the room is. Why? Because sleeping in a room of two makes me feel alone.

Like, totally alone.

Oh. And I won't go to the window, looking for what's coming. Because I know, nobody ever sees one.


Hello October.

I just figured out the best time to chat with friends is during a heavy rain in a very late Monday night. Outside and with neither football fans nor mamaks around.

Few days back, I bumped into this tweets by some friend wondering what will their life be when both their parent gone/death. I smiled. Seventeen years of watching a single mother struggled hard to raise her six children came to view.

This morning, I talk of something that I rarely share to others. Something that even my housemates won't even care to ask about. Or maybe I am too secretive to tell them about.

My late father.

Believe me, dude. You wouldn't want that day to come.