Momentum Girl.

(dedicated for those who wait.)

She walks on the sight of grace in plain feeling.
step on the tricky stones of attention vigorously without even notice the shake. she’s in that pace. the hold-me-not pace. steadily actuated by the motivation of being there, the place she know. where the seat of glory is waiting for her. to be grabbed. she’s so focused like in her parallel universe she were there. nothing can stop her momentum nor shake her focus.

She never even stop at any romance checkpoint.

She knew her surrounding matters still.
that is very why she care to give her precious glimpse. she’s always humble on any wave of encouragement or the warm greet. alas, she always missed my hi-there smile. damn. still, i send her passed through with glad feeling smirk. as a genuine looser, i keep hi-ing her. not a fan like, just adoring her attitude, kinda. i happen to like anybody like that; on pursuit, always constant in feeling.

Oddly enough, she stood in front of me today.
greet me softly before she kill me with that deep brown eye stare. blew me into pieces with that bomb of concern question. she even care to let me be in her shoes by telling me her small secret. about she actually noticed me and point her radar on me all these years but kind of waiting for me to make a move first. fak. am i on the dreamland? i pinched my consciousness few times silently. idiotically nice, i just replied short on every dialog changed between us. cutting every lifeline of chances eh? i cursed myself at the moment she left, leaving me wrecked slowly.

There she goes again, on her very own momentum lane.


Speak With Me by Elza Irdalynna.

This is the letter wrote by Elza Irdalynna; Benjy's Sister. I found this on Amir Muhammad's facebook last friday but I just didn't have much time to post it.


Speak With Me.
On March 11th, he was arrested at his apartment's parking lot in Segambut. Police brought him to an apartment he rented in Kepong, and after entering, claimed that in that residence, he possessed 800grams of cocaine, and 140grams of methamphetamine, and accused him of processing and trafficking, putting him under the risk of being charged under Section 39B, which carries the death penalty.

On March 12th he was remanded for 7 days. When my parents inquired if we can engage a lawyer, the Investigation Officer told us "No need".

On March 17th, after our family waited more than an hour, we were allowed to see him for the very first time, under supervision.
Again my mother asked if we should get him a lawyer, again the I.O advised against it, claiming "Lawyer tak boleh buat apa-apa sekarang. Buang duit je. (Lawyer can't do anything now. It's simply a waste of money)."

On March 18th, his remand was extended another 7 days. The magistrate inquired why there was no lawyer present for him, and whether he was made aware he had the right to a counsel of his choice. He replied "No." Therefore, he requested for one, and only nine hours later, did the I.O call to inform my mother, who promptly engaged Amer Hamzah Arshad.

But the very next day, the police used their Executive authority under Section 28A that vetoed his right to a counsel. All requests made by our lawyer to visit him was denied.

Only after we complained to SUHAKAM, did the police allow Amer to visit him.
On the last day of his remand.
After the investigations were concluded.
For only 15 minutes.

On March 25th, he was brought to court, and charged under Section 12(2) for possession of 0.24grams of metaphetamin in his Segambut residence. Nothing the police claimed they found in the Kepong residence, the cocaine and shabu that was "already packaged to be distributed" or the so called "cocaine processing mini-lab" was brought to court.

Because there WAS none.

He was released on bail. A trial date was set. He was so close to being free, and seeing his 4 year old son again.
But as he was signing the papers of his release, the Plainclothes were outside waiting.

Not two steps after he came out of the bail department, without any explanation, they re-arrested him. Amer was restrained from protecting him, and only after Amer repeatedly asked them to show their I.D, did they do so. Still, no explanation was given to the family. We were merely told to go to the Headquarters and speak to Inspector Kang. The same guy who claimed my brother possessed the cocaine they NEVER found.

He never saw us, he was "in a meeting." He wasn't too occupied to give the press a statement, but was unavailable to see us.
We were told by the new I.O for this case, and the DSP (the guy who signed the papers denying my brother the right to a counsel) that they are detaining him for 60 days under the Special Preventive Measures Act (LPK), after which, they could further detain him for 2 years if found guilty.

Guilty according to THEM. For under this act, it is a detention without trial, like the Internal Security Act. Any information gathered from "witnesses" and "investigations" will never be disclosed to him or his lawyer, or the court. He will also not be able to defend himself against any allegations. Under this act, he will never have his day in court.

On March 25th, my brother, Ben, was denied his Constitutional rights.

For 2 weeks, our family went through hell. Sleepless nights, press waiting outside our door, Ben had asthma attacks after the police delayed themselves in acquiring the requested medication for 3 days, Mama, who is a cancer patient herself, suffered chest pains and lost her voice.
We felt it was all worth it, for we would be able to have him back.

But now, a new nightmare has begun.
Whether or not Ben is guilty, should not be for the Police to decide. If they HAD the evidence to strengthen their warrant for re-arrest, why was it not brought to court? Why is Ben not given a chance to defend himself? How can we ever know the authenticity of these so called witnesses and their statements? If there were ANY to begin with?

Under this act, I could simply be caught for any crimes of drug offences the police accuse me of, because they can claim they have enough information (even if they have absolutely nothing) and detain me. For 60 days, for 2 years, and even EXTEND it after.

Acts like this and the ISA are licenses for ARBITRARY arrest and detention. Anytime. Anywhere. Anybody.

My family and Amer will not back down. We will fight for Ben's right. We will speak up for all of those who were silenced before us, who will be silenced hereafter.

But we seek your help. In any way at all, help us fight this. Re-post this, write on your blogs, write to your local representative, to our newspapers, and together we shall use our voice, our art, our space, to stand up not just for Ben, but for all our rights.

Liberty is a Constitutional right. It's time to get it back.


It's not about playing a blame game on who's wrong and who's right. I read/post this to the fact that I do care about my and others rights. On equality. Come on. You and that big brain of yours should understand better. Peace.


Sharing is Caring

Cehh. Ignore the title.
Just wanna share something. THIS. Look-At-The-Price. To me, no more MPH, and Popular. Just Amcorp Mall Amcorp Mall and Amcorp Mall.




That's when I know I prefer a lavender than roses.

'do you believe in hallucinations, silly dreams or imaginations, don't go away cause I feel you this time, don't go away cause I need you there this time'~music~

As I lay myself on the bridal chamber,

She peeled the skin out of me. Dried it. And wraps the once white roses carved from my skull, now painted with my young red blood, nicely. She then pulls the spine from my back. Crunch it with that black hammer of hers and with a few drop of tears she impressively turns it to a ribbons. Gold ribbons whom tie the wrapper. That wrapped the roses, yes.

And by faking a smile, I know I let her.

'do you believe in hallucinations, any dream or it's revaluation, don't go away cause I need you there this time, don't go away cause I'm making you all mine'

"Ah damn we always tend to think bout others..."
HafizChan on I'm damn cowardy even with this two sharp Cullen-look-a-like fangs.

Thanks for the spot-on dude.

Owh. And all the roses-thing-hallucinations was none but an exaggeration. Don't bother.

But it did hurt. Fuck.


Sorry. Totally have no idea so it just a random post

3 months to go. And i absolutely do nothing. Eating, online, gaming, movie-ing, youtube-ing. Eating. And eat again. And again. And again. These activities totally drive me to crazy. Superb bo-ring! Well, sometimes i fullfilled my fucking holiday by reading books. The result is positive ; currently addicted to books.

done with ;
Remember Me by Sophie Kinsella
Shopaholic and Baby by Sophie Kinsella
Tunas by Hlovate
Rooftop Rant by Hlovate
5tahun5bulan by Hlovate
aA+bB by Hlovate
Diary of a Wimpy Kid (red cover) by Jeff Kinney
Diary of a Wimpy Kid (green, blue, yellow cover) - POPULAR. kehkehkeh. no need to buy huh? ^^

currently ;
Babylon Rising by Tim Lahaye and Greg Dinallo - I borrow it from this weirdo-funny-brat. It feels so great to have a 'penpal'. Haha. He got my Remember Me.

And i still looking for penpals. Anyone?

p/s ; I know some of you might know her in former times, but I just wanna share. Check out her writings. Kinda cool. The character, the plot etc. And it is not publish by Alaf21. Not a loveydovey type. Thanks.


Clarification: Dots.

It's a single dot what differed me from you. It's a single dot that made me hate you. It's a single dot that separated he and she and they. It's a single dot that created diversity. It's a single dot that make once unbeatable dynasty a history.

"Hey, come on dude. It's just a single dot. No big deal."


I'm damn cowardy even with this two sharp Cullen-look-a-like fangs.

You know what differ human from other living things? We human have heart to spare with. We human have heart to take care of. I'm not sure if animals or trees got that responsibility, like the one I've seen on TV and silver screen. But as a pretty realistic person, I just assume they don't.

In life we human experienced a lot of things. A lot of parts. From happy to sad to the greatest ever feeling and even to the lowest points you can ever reach. All this affect this red-blooded little thing called heart. Yours and theirs.

And to take care of a heart is never an easier thing to accomplish. I've tried. Way too many.

I don't spell an AEROBIC when I'm sure it is an ESCAPE written on the card. Yup. I know. They asks me to do that too. But I just can't. Why? Because I know it's somebody's feeling I'm playing with. Somebody's heart I'm messing with.

Again. I don't hate it. But I just don't prefer it. Right now. Who knows I might enjoy it later, no?

Fangs? That just so bull-shitting.


World without L.

Caught in the middle of the state-of-confusion mind, I sound like an egoist pilot who hit a two hundred thousand feet high bird and says that it was the bird whom flying too low. Too complicated to quote? Let it be shit then.

I just lost my word. Sorry.